Warning! This is a work of fiction and does not offer advice of any kind. Names, characters, businesses, places, events and incidents are either the products of the author's imagination or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. The presumption of innocence applies to everyone mentioned in this article.
Evil, brutal, twisted, sick, absolutetly common German Children Songs
Did you ever wonder why the German citizens have never been known as particular peace-loving or mentally healthy people? If your guess was the Aryan Übermenschen genetics, you are only partly right. This combined with evil german children stories and songs that are worse than most horror stories in other countries.
Evil, Sick & Gruesome German Children Songs:
Just for clarification, these are not satire songs aimed at adults. This is the shit you actually sing in Kindergarten and if you ask any German speaker, he is certain to know them. Not only know them but sing along those happy tunes.
- Ein Hund kam in die Küche
Translation: A dog came into the kitchen, and stole the cook an egg, the cook took a knife, and cut the dog in two. Many dogs came, and dug the dog a grave, and placed a tombstone, on whom was written: [Repeat]
2. Kuckuck
On a tree sat a cuckoo
[Brain insane refrain]
On a tree a cuckoo sat
Then came a young hunter
[Brain insane refrain]
Then a young hunter came
He shot at the poor cuckoo
[Brain insane refrain]
He shot the poor cuckoo dead
3. Hoppe, hoppe, Reiter
Translation:
Hoppe, hoppe, rider
If he falls he cries
If he falls into the trench
Ravens are going to eat him
If he falls into the swamp
The rider goes flop
4. Maikäfer flieg
May bug fly
Your daddy died at war
Mother is in Pommerland
Pommerland is burned to ashes
May bug fly
May bug fly
Your brother died at war
The king fell from his horse
they took from him his fairy castle
May bug fly
5. Mariechen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ElvgqzeLO8U
Mariechen was sitting on a stone
She combed her golden hair
Mariechen watch out
There came the young huntsman
Then came an evil witch who charmed the huntsman to believe Mariechen to be a Bambi
He shot Mariechen in her heart
The blood poured to the ground
6. Fuchs du hast die Gans gestohlen
If you think that you have experienced the worst of the psychopathic German children songs already, you are wrong. Here is a song that is known and loved by virtually every single German speaker and Kindergarten teachers favourite:
Fox you stole the goose,
give her back
otherwise, the hunter is gonna get you with his thunderstick
His big, long, shotgun, shoots at you the pellets
so the red ink colors you
and then you are dead
I hope you enjoyed this little insight into the magnificent German culture and stay tuned for the most gruesome and brutal children stories. The next time you interact with a German, think about the psychopathic german children songs & stories that influenced his whole childhood and interact accordingly.
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